Negotiation Body Language Secret # 387: Extended and Interwoven Fingers

This is United States Senator and former Presidential Candidate, John Kerry, D-MA. He is pictured here during a recent meeting of the "Super Committee" (The United States Congress Joint Selection Committee on Deficit Reduction). He is one of its twelve members.

The tension in his mid-face, the thinning of the lips, the clenching of Kerry's jaw and the lowering of his eye brows are all consistent with anger.  I want to draw your attention to his hands however. Notice his fingers are intertwined and extended. This is a great nonverbal tell of stress. When the fingers are extended and interwoven in this fashion - there is a significant component of anxiety present (Navarro). In an interview or meeting setting, it is very likely that the question which was just asked or the issue which was just raised - evoked this anxiety. You would be well advised to slow down the conversation, dig deeper and use the Socratic method to get to the root of this great body language tell.

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Negotiation Body Language Secret # 771: Many Signals Steeple on the Super Committee

This is an excellent Body Language photo of the four of the Congressional "Super Committee" members (United States Congress Joint Committee on Deficit Reduction). Most notable here and in most in focus is Rep. Fred Upton R-MI (light colored shirt and only one not in a suit jacket). His hands (and eyes) are in sending several messages in a group of simultaneous gestures. 

Notice how Representative Upton is covering his mouth - as are three of the four men pictured here. In this context, it is a signal of strong disapproval and even disbelief of the speaker (unseen) or the opinion being voiced. 

Mr. Upton's mostly interlaced fingers indicates negative/frustrated/defensive emotions and perhaps impatience (as does his democratic colleague to his right, Rep. Jim Clyburn D-SC). 

Upton's index fingers are meeting in a modified, partial steeple which is an extremely common nonverbal in a person of authority. A steeple, particularly a high steeple indicates confidence - however this is a partial steeple - ergo a lower level of confidence. The steeple gesture (particularly a full steeple) should be used only briefly and in well chosen times and settings as it often sends signals of arrogance and condescension. 

Thumbs on the chin is often a sign of true thought and consideration (note the Committee Member two seats to Mr. Upton's right - while not fully visible, probably has his thumb on his chin as well). 

Finally notice Fred Upton's eyes are mostly or entirely closed. This is a blocking signal - in effect Mr. Upton's subconscious is wishing whatever he is hearing/visualizing away for a few seconds.

So in summary in Representative Upton we see the following emotions as displayed via Body Language:  

1. Strong disapproval, and perhaps thoughts he (and others) believe he (they) are hearing deception
2. Negative/frustrated/defensive emotions and/or impatience
3. Confidence (but not overly confident)
4. True thought and contemplation
5. A "wishing away" (psychological blocking)

This is a very complex body language photo (still only partially analyzed). Of course in the real world in which we all live and work is in a constant state of flux with words being spoken and many other distractions ....and they won't hold still for us to dissect. 

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Negotiation Body Language Secret 731: Super Mario Monte's Dominant Spider

This is Mario Monte, aka "Super Mario". He's the Yale educated, Italian economist, politician, Bocconi University President and adviser to Goldman Sachs, who's been asked to step in as the Italian Prime Minister after Silvio Berlusconi's recent resignation. The gesture he's using here is what I call "The Dominant Spider". Like other palm-down gestures, it sends a message of authority and dominance. Palm down gestures should be used very sparingly and as the vast majority of the audience will feel patronized. "Overly Alpha Males" (and females) tend to use palm down gestures in excess. Such personalities do not lend themselves to negotiation or compromise (See Negotiation Secret # 702).

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Negotiation Body Language Secret # 665: A Strong Sign of Insincerity

Bashar al-Assad has chronically displayed signals of insincerity. This moderate resolution image of Syria's current President exemplifies a great nonverbal beacon of this emotional feign. When a person is gesturing to their upper chest, if it's sincere - it's a subconscious body language signal. When someone is trying to deceive you though - their subconscious sabotages the conscious mind, and we will see highly characteristic nonverbal tells of dishonesty - if we know what & where to look.  

There are several characteristics to be wary of ... enter al-Assad. Notice how he touches his chest only with the tips of his fingers & thumb. If someone is being honest with their feelings, their PALM will touch too, not just their fingers. This In addition, al-Assad is using his non-dominant hand (he's right handed) - if he were sincere, he'd be using his right, dominant hand. Another sign to look for, is an insincere person will sometimes place their hand on the RIGHT (the heart-less) side of the chest (the heart is on the left side). President al-Assad only shows this to a mild degree in this particular example and we would probably miss it here if we didn't have the benefit of a still-photo or video to examine (see Negotiation Body Language Secrets: # 19, 35 & 42 for a better example of this "hand-on-wrong-side-of-chest" signal).

Chronic insincerity is a very strong indicator of what psychological disorder(s)? 

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Negotiation Body Language Secret # 349: Pointing with Two Fingers (or more)

When you're speaking and you feel the need to point, there are several different ways to do so. Some are better and some are horrific. The more digits you use to point with, the more it "softens" the point - and the less you offend. If done correctly, you'll build rapport with your audience - even an audience of one. It is best to point with the entire hand - with all five digits approximately three-quarters extended but still relaxed and the palm directed upwards. The wrist, elbow and shoulder should be relaxed as well. The more fully extended (and thus more tense) these joints are - the greater a similar level of tension will be displayed on the face. These tensions feed off each other. Here Julia Gillard, the Prime Minister of Australia, points with two fingers and her thumb - however because of the 95% full extension of these digits as well as a similar effort in her entire arm - although it has less sting than the classic one-finger point, she would be well advised to further mellow-out this gesture. Pointing is a universally negative nonverbal - regardless of your culture or country.

Everyone can remember a parent telling us when we were very young, "...don't point, it's rude...", or some variation on this theme - and yet very many an accomplished and otherwise skilled adult commits this body language sin all too often..... a' la David Stern (see: Negotiation Secret # 339: Don't Point at Me! I'm Not Your Child!) Whom have you pointed at today?

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Negotiation Body Language Secret # 373: Papademos, Greece and Eyelids

Pictured above is Lucas Papademos, the New Prime Minister of Greece. Notice his eyelids are both partially closed, but his left is closed a bit more. This is a fantastic tell of a negative judgement and/or a skeptical opinion. You can almost hear him rendering a negative statement here - and yet it's incredible how often people will speak positivity about a person and/or issue and use this expression. Duplicitous! Now of course, the Prime Minister may very well had making a negative declaration in this moment - and if he was, this facial body language is completely expected. However...if you see another use this facial nonverbal tell - but they speak glowingly - believe their body language, not their words. Watch out!

There often is co-existing mid-face tightening seen with this asymmetrical eyelid closure as well, particularly in the "mustache area". Lucas demonstrates that splendidly here. Also be on the lookout for nasal dilation. Mr. Papademos' left nostril is brilliantly flared here, indicating coexisting contempt. I wonder to whom he was speaking?

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Negotiation and Leadership Secret # 415: When is it Appropriate for a President to Stand in the "Fig-leaf"?

Yesterday, Veterans Day in the U.S., President Obama attended a ceremony in Arlington National Cemetery. Here is is pictured at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. The President is standing with his hands-clasped in this very familiar "Fig-Leaf" formation. While the fig-leaf usually is a signal of low confidence - in some contexts it certainly indicates other emotions. One is respect and another is reverence. These are two leadership-appropriate messages a President or Head of State should desire to convey using the fig-leaf. 

So when is it appropriate for a President to Stand in the "Fig-leaf"? Very few times. One example is a funeral or a ceremony to honor those who have died serving in the military - as pictured above. Another is at any religious service. If he were meeting with the Dalai Lama, the Pope or another high religious leader he/she may want to adopt this pose as well - even if there was no service or ongoing religious activity. If a past-president or head-of-state was standing next to the current equivalent leader at a ceremony or introduction, the former leader may want to use the fig-leaf here as well. Weddings are another venue for the fig-leaf.

With these few exceptions, and perhaps a few other respect-reverence scenarios which I have omitted, a head-of-state should never stand in the fig-leaf pose, lest he/she convey low confidence. A head-of-state should not adopt this pose around other World leaders if he/she is to command respect (unless of course at a funeral, etc. as detailed above). It will certainly place them at a leadership and negotiation disadvantage. Moreover, standing this way will even change your physiology and actively lower one's confidence. Nonverbal signals are indications of what the emotional brain is feeling in real-time, and maintaining the body language will engender and reinforce the emotion.

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Negotiation Secret # 217: Predicting a Fight (Boxing) based on Body Language

Can you predict the outcome of a boxing match based on the Body Language of the fighters? Yes. At least you can say who, going into the fight has more confidence. In tonight's Manny "Pacman" Pacquiao vs. Juan Manuel Marquez III fight in Las Vegas, Pacquiao not only demonstrates more confidence, but Marquez shows some trepidation. Both of these men are in great shape and are considered by many to be two of boxing's best - so clearly they each have talent, skill and experience. Any athlete knows though - that in close games, races, matches or fights - it comes down to who has more confidence.

In the above image, while the resolution is modest, one can clearly see the suppressed yet sincere smile of Pacquiao (left). His raised cheeks and orbicularis oculi pars orbitalis muscles (which elevate the cheeks and surround and close the eyelids) each "bunch-up" the tissue of his lower lids. This is a fantastic example of someone smiling with their eyes while trying to suppress their mouth component of the smile (most people wrongfully think the mouth is the only component of a smile). Yet we still can still see the corners of his mouth elevated. Marquez (right) is clearly frowning. He's not trying to look mean or menacing here - he's frowning. Frowning is anything but a beacon of confidence.

Another difficult thing to see in this photo (but it can be seen in videos of this weigh-in) is Marquez's tendency to chew on the inside of his mouth. In the Body Language lexicon, this is known as "false mastication" and in this context, it is a classic nonverbal sign of fear-anxiety. In other settings it may indicate lying-anxiety (See Negotiation Secret # 33: False Mastication for a better photographic example).

Another signal in the image above, is very subtle. It's a trace of fear in Marquez's eyes. Can you see it?

In the photo below, I want to call your attention to each man's shoulders. Pacquiao's are positioned more posterior (towards his back) giving him a much more "squared-off" appearance. Marquez's shoulders are considerably more forward - giving his shoulders a rounded silhouette. This is a strong signal of high confidence (Pacquiao) vs. low confidence (Marquez). Head position is also very important, however Marquez's slight chin-forward, nose up pose is so cliche' in boxing weigh-ins, as to be a caricature - so in this particular moment, it has little meaning.

Based on each boxer's confidence at the time of this weigh-in, Manny "Pacman" Pacquiao will defeat Juan Manuel Marquez. You heard it here first. How much are you wagering on Manny?

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Negotiation Body Language Secret # 347: Joe Paterno's Regret

This image of Joe Paterno was taken on November 9, 2011 - after he announced his retirement - but a few hours before the Penn State Board of Trustees fired him. At first glance what most people see is a half-hearted attempt at a smile. This is one of several variations of what is known as a "Social Smile". If you look just at Paterno's mouth - this would be sub-classified as a "bitter smile" (Ekman). Of course, it does not represent joy or happiness. It is characterized by a closed mouth, lips moderately lightened, with the corners drawn more laterally than a sincere smile. The cheeks are bunched-up (contracted) but this contracture is lower on face than that of a true, felt smile. It often co-exists with other negative emotional signs - see below.

Superimposed on this variation of a "Social Smile" is disgust. Joe's "mustache area" (below the nose and above the upper lip) is tightened and elevated along with some nasal flaring. In addition, the nasal-labial furrows (creases running from the lower sides of the nose past the corners of the mouth) are deepened. These are very characteristic signals of disgust. Disgust is not always an emotion felt toward others, sometimes it is self-directed. 

Extremely telling here is Coach Paterno's central forehead muscle contraction. When you see such a display, you should think first of pain - either emotional or physical. These pains may be directly being experienced or felt through empathy. Since we know the story (or part of it) behind his departure, his pain here is emotional.

As you learn nonverbal communication, be careful not to place too much emphasis on only one signal. Depending on their contexts - these signs may have wholly different meanings. Body language must be interpreted in totality. This photo of Joe is a great example - that in the real World, it is very common to see several emotions simultaneously. Here we see displayed: a social smile (bitter smile), disgust as well as (emotional) pain. When several signs are seen at the same time or nearly so - these are known as "clusters"- which are analogous to sentences. How fluent are you?

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Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 346: Rick Perry Forgets: 8 Republican Presidential Hopefuls Debate in Detroit - 60 seconds of Oops, Body Language and Empathy

Last Night the 2012 Republican Presidential hopefuls had another debate in Rochester, Michigan. This video clip will no doubt be shown for years to come as to what not to do in a debate. If you haven't seen it yet, watch it now - it's only 60 seconds long. There's some good, bad, and ugly and very useful body language lessons here.

0:01 - 0:06 Gov. Rick Perry:  He begins this clip with the MAJOR FAUX PAS, "Finger point-hand chop" (FPHC). This is always a negative nonverbal. It offends the audience and it will lose you voters/believers/employees' respect - even if they initially like you. It is universally negatively received and will interpreted as patronizing at best. If someone displays FPHC in response to an accusation (which doesn't apply to Gov. Perry here) then there is a very high likelihood of a simultaneous deceptive statement. Remember President Bill Clinton? (see "Change the Person, Time and circumstances a bit, if this were your spouse or co-worker, how would you call this?").

0:08 - 0:16 Gov. Rick Perry: "...it's three agencies - that when I get there that will be gone, Commerce, Education, and...." At the beginning of this segment, Perry does a smart thing that most politicians don't take advantage of - he begins counting on his thumb. Most North Americans begin counting on their index finger (Pease) - Perry starts with his thumb. This does two things: it allows the candidate to use the thumbs up gesture first - which is a near-universal display of optimism (when they begin to count). It also simultaneously avoids the pseudo-point when counting with the index finger first. Finger pointing is also universally negatively received. Unfortunately the whole video is centered around him forgetting the third Federal Department he wants to omit ...so this nonverbal pearl is overshadowed by his memory lapse.

Notice how when it came time to name the third department, while his thumb and his index finger were fully extended - showing his commitment and demonstrating the strength of his opinion - his middle finger did not become fully lengthened - but only half so. It mirrored his memory. His conscious mind couldn't remember the Department of Energy. He had nothing to commit to - so his subconscious mind reflected this lack of commitment-confidence. If he had only forgot for a second instead, and then recalled it, his third digit would have become fully extended. But he didn't.... Rather his other finger and thumb curled up to match it. If people count on their fingers and yet they don't fully extend them - while their words may say they're certain and confident - DON'T BELIEVE THEM. Watch their fingers.

At 0:16 Perry pointed at his temple. People very often touch or scratch this particular region when they're trying to recall something. Rick demonstrates that very well here.

Ron Paul makes the mistake of turning towards Perry. This gives Perry more credibility than Paul should want to give. After all - it's a debate. Paul makes a further mistake too. While holding up all five digits (presumably trying to say he thinks five Federal Departments should be cut) - he shows Perry five digits. Then he does the same to the audience. He held up the back of his hand to Perry while showing the audience his palm. This should have been done in reverse. Showing someone your palm is considerably more offensive and disrespectful. Paul should seek to demonstrate respect for the audience while making his point - and also dismissing Perry. Most people cringe when they see the gesture of the palm-forward-claw as Paul showed us/the audience.

At 0:30 - 0:35, when anchor/commentator John Harwood says, "....Seriously....is the EPA the one you were talking about or....?" Notice Harwood's forehead muscles contract, wrinkling his forehead and elevating his brow. When another's forehead/eyebrows take this formation upon asking a question, there is a very high probability they already know (or believe they know) the answer to the question which THEY ARE ASKING. It maybe obvious and sarcastically-rhetorical, but it is often camouflaged. Depending on the context and what other nonverbals are clustered with it - this may also indicate incredulity.

At the 0:45 - 0:50 mark, when Gov. Perry is again trying to recall the departments he would cut, he looks down and to HIS left. Right handed people will very often look in this quadrant when trying to choose the correct words, phrases, syntax, etc. After 0:50, Perry looks straight down at his notes, but the Department of Energy is not to be found.

At the 0:57 - 0:58 mark, Perry shows us a great subtle expression of Contempt. The left side of his mouth elevates in what may look to some as a partial-half smile. There is also some mild nasal dilation. The object of his contempt is most probably himself.

Oops! Stepped in it!

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