Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1055: The Subtle Lip Purse

This Image of Tom Brady taken during the media availability-press conference in preparation for Super Bowl XLVI yesterday, shows two subtle emotional displays.

Anyone can spot dramatic emotion. I am continually dumbfounded by the percentage of otherwise socially adept, worldly and educated adults who cannot accurately identify moderate, let alone subtle emotional body language cues. The New England quarterback is displaying a very subtle lip purse here (see: Negotiation Secret # 9: Nancy's Lip Purse, for a more obvious example). When the lips are pursed, there is a disagreement taking place. But in a high percentage of the time, the disagreement will not be verbally expressed. In addition, those who display this expression are in a "position of power" wherein they feel they can implement their plan/idea. Thus when you see this nonverbal signal, be prepared for a proverbial "end-run". There is a reason that their opinion is not being openly expressed. Ambush. Hmmm..... perhaps there are some business applications here.

Emotions rarely occur in isolation, and here the Patriots' QB is no exception. Mr. Gisele Bundchen's second emotion is disgust. The specific facial signals to look for here are both the mild tightening of the "mustache area" and particularly his subtle nostril flare. Additionally, he is not looking directly at the person(s) who is (are) the object of his feelings. We don't look directly at those who we don't like, don't respect or don't believe

New York Giants by 7

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Negotiation Body Language Secret # 921: Spotting Giants' Sincerity

Can you spot sincerity? Are you sure? Most experienced, educated and financially successful people cannot. One common nonverbal component of sincerity is a true smile. Insincere smiles are exceedingly common. Pictured here, Steve Tisch, Chairman and Executive VP of the New York Giants and Eli Manning, their quarterback, both show us sincere smiles after their recent victory over the San Francisco 49ers in the NFC championship Game - although Eli is suppressing his joy slightly. 

The key to detecting a sincere smile is looking at the eyelids - they MUST be partially closed. Yet, it is not as simple as this - for the eyelids may be partially closed in different ways. The characteristic closure must involve the outer portions of the Orbicularis Oculi Muscles (the pars orbitalis component) - which pull the eyebrows and the skin beneath them slightly DOWNWARD - while simultaneously (along with the zygomaticus major muscle of the cheeks) "bunch-up" the skin of the lower eyelids creating the highly characteristic concave-up creases (best exemplified here on Mr. Tisch's lower eyelids).

There are many characteristics to sincerity, and the ability to detect the subtle body language changes of true, felt smiles (or false smiles) are obviously a very important skill to learn and refine. Remember, if an insincere smile is displayed, it does not necessarily mean that the person as a whole is insincere all the time - but it does mean that in that moment, the emotion of joy-happiness is having to be forced/acted. If chronic insincerity is displayed however - this is a completely different issue, as there may very well be sociopathy present. Insincerity is not as clearly defined as lying, however those who are insincere, will eventually lie to you - probably sooner than later, and probably very often.

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