Thursday, June 30, 2011

Negotiation Secret # 119: What's Wrong with this Smile?

Most would agree Jillian Michaels is a beautiful woman who's in incredible shape. When it comes to her smile, however she makes a common mistake, albeit a largely subconscious one. Ms. Michaels' smile seen here is not a true, sincere smile - it is an example of one of many variations of what is known as a "Social (false) Smile".  True smiles, indicative of sincere joy, are difficult to make "on demand". Social smiles are certainly needed and can be thought of as a "social lubricant". Some social smiles are better than others though. Ms. Michaels over-tightens her mid-face here and subsequently her nostrils dilate. This appearance is amplified by her tilting her head back.  This bilateral nostril dilation, especially with a closed mouth "smile", conveys the emotion of disgust.  Amazingly, many people have this as their default "pretend (social) smile". While very few people could tell you her face is consistent with disgust, it will leave most everyone with a distinct cold feeling. This (and others) types of false smiles are distancing - not bonding. True smiles build rapport. Never pass up on an opportunity to build rapport. I am certain Jillian does not want to alienate others, do you? Are you doing so without realizing it?