Romance, Marriage and Dating - Body Language Secret # 771: Ann's and Mitt's Affectionate Hug

Mitt and Ann Romney are shown here just after the former Massachusetts Governor's narrow victory in the Iowa Caucuses last night. One signal of a truly affectionate hug is beautifully exemplified here (particularly by Ann Romney) in the head-to-head, neck-to-head and head to chest/shoulder touching. Surface area contact between these areas are directly proportional to the level of affection felt in that moment. Mitt is leaning forward, which is certainly affectionate in this context - however if his head were tilted to his right (towards Ann) - it would be an even stronger emotional display. A twist to this nonverbal in this particular setting though - is that a neck tilt often sends vulnerability signals. Thus although there are exceptions, it is unusual for politicians and other leaders to tilt their heads when in public. Mitt is also in the midst of mental multitasking, ergo his emotions and thoughts are more divided, while Ann is more focused in the moment.

Additionally, eyelid closure during an embrace is strongly correlated with sincere affection. Those who hug with open eyelids are either lacking in affection or emotionally/mentally distracted. When hugs between lovers begin to lack the head, neck, upper chest contact described above or show diminishing eyelid closure - the love is waning.

See also:  Flirting & Romance Secret # 2: Hugs as a Measure of Affection and Impending Break-up

See also:  Flirting & Romance Secret # 39: Affectionate vs. Non-Affectionate Hugs
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Body Language Secret # 619: Head and Neck Contact with Love and Affection

There are several things you should see during a hug when true love and affection are felt (see also Body Language Secret # 105: Parental Love and Affection). One of these is a touching of the heads and necks accompanied by a bending of the necks. It's as if you're trying to get the maximum surface area possible in contact with the other person. This is true between parent and a child as well in romantic adult relationships. The persistent absence of this highly characteristic Body Language signal is particularly worrisome.

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Flirting and Romance Secret No. 39: Affectionate vs. Non-Affectionate Hug • Tom Cruze and Cameron Diaz (PHHOTO)

In this photograph of Tom and Cameron hugging, Ms. Diaz is more affectionate than Mr. Cruise.  First notice how Mr. Cruise is turned away from the hug. His feet and his body are pointed away from Cameron.  When the lower body is turned and separated in a hug, there's not much affection.  He's also only hugging with one arm.   It would be interesting to see what his eyes look like, but his mouth is certainly not consistent with happiness.  His mid-face and mouth are tightened.  Mr. Cruise is normally pretty good at expressing a smile when he tries, but here we glimpse into his actual emotions in real-time.

Cameron leans into the hug, and although her lower body is still separated from Tom she is showing more affection (The most affectionate hugs are when the lower bodies are touching as well as the upper bodies).  Ms. Diaz's feet and her entire body are pointed towards Mr. Cruise and she is hugging with both arms. I'd wager she had a true smile on her face at the moment this photograph was taken.

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