I had the pleasure of contributing to an article in Refinery29 earlier this week regarding White House Press Secretary, Sarah Huckabee Sanders and some of her many nonverbal deception tells. Here is the link:
As with all sports, the psychological approach to the golf is, by most accounts, the primary predictor of success - or failure. And once it's lost, this 'head-game' often proves extremely difficult to reestablish.
Perhaps there is no greater example of this phenomenon, that Tiger Woods. Ever since his highly publicized marital problems in 2009, he's rarely approached even a shadow of his former dominance. And his anticipated return to The Masters this year has, thus far, has disappointed his fans. As of this writing (after two of four rounds), he stands at +7, 13 strokes off the current leader, Patrick Reed.
In the image above we see Woods rubbing/scratching his forehead. There's no doubt he was probably sweating - and there's also no doubt he was probably experiencing an itch. And yet, by far, the number one reason we touch our faces (or anywhere on the head and neck) is due to real (not imagined) facial itching - caused by Anxiety. Anxiety, of course, has many etiologies - and depending on the other nonverbal signals with which it is clustered, these root-causes can sometimes be determined.
We also close our eyes and/or cover our eyes during moments of emotional processing - that is, when the 'emotional brain' is trying to come to terms with what the 'logical brain' already knows has happened.
In this second image of Tiger Woods, we see him passing self-judgment on his own shot - displaying the emotion of Disgust. Moderate in its magnitude, Woods' disgust is primarily manifested by his mid-facial tension (in the region just above his upper lip and below his nose). In addition, we see his nostril flaring, lowering of the corners of his mouth, and his lower lip depression - in this cluster, all of these indicate disgust.
While not a required component of disgust, Woods' partial eyelid closure act as a disgust-amplifier.
During the moment when this third image of Woods' was taken, the golfer was experiencing Fear. His fear is subtly-to-mildly manifested with the configuration of Tiger's mouth - with its corners pulled mildly backward (posteriorly).
But more noticeably, we see fear displayed in Woods' eyes. Tiger Woods's eyelids are opened slightly wider than baseline - but crucially, there's also lower eyelid tension (tightening) - while his eyebrows are also slightly lowered (more so on his left).
Summary: When we feel negative emotions - and subsequently display them on our faces and bodies - our own actions will reinforce these unwanted feelings - acting as a biofeedback loop reinforcement mechanism for these behaviors (e.g., the angry get angrier, the disgusted grow even more disgusted, etc.). In the process of training for - or competing in any sport (or life), this phenomenon is profound. Negative displays should be minimized and hopefully nearly eliminated - but never ignored.
One nonverbal (and a near absolute) debate mistake - is the touching of one's face. With rare exception, facial touching during a debate, a speech, and interview - or any kind of public appearance - should never be performed. The audience (even an audience of one) will interpret this as suspicious and often deceptive (even if they have no formal nonverbal training) - and a significantly high percentage of the time, they'd be correct.
Marine Le Pen displayed facial touching at multiple times during this debate.
Another mistake Le Pen made was using a "Pseudoprayer hand-chop". This conveys a patronizing and condescending emotional tone - and while its use tends to solidify the connections/strength of commitment with those who already are followers - people who are undecided (and also those who already disagree) will become alienated (or more alienated) upon seeing the pseudoprayer hand-chop.
Thus, the pseudoprayer hand-chop is one of many nonverbal signals which, while often will make its user feel more assertive and alpha - it also simultaneously acts as a rapport destroyer to their audience.
Summary: From a nonverbal perspective, Emmanuel Macron significantly outperformed Marine Le Pen in their Wednesday debate. Ms. Le Pen also displayed multiple signals consistent with deception.
This is video is not recent (it's from 5 January 2005), but of course body language is timeless. It in, Alicia Keys is a guest on Charlie Rose's show and she sings him "Happy Birthday".
Note that both Charlie Rose and Alicia Keys both blush. They also both smile sincerely. If there is ever a doubt in your mind regarding whether a smile is truly sincere (aka Duchenne Smile) - always remember this: when blushing is present, the smile is ALWAYS one of sincerity.
There are also two "Sincerity Amplifiers" present in this short video. In the context of a sincere smile - when a person is also singing - AND they're rocking back and forth (as Alicia does), this rocking display acts as a SINCERITY AMPLIFIER.
Charlie Rose displays another variety of a sincerity amplifier. When a blushing person (with or without a smile) - is also touching their face (particularly with the PALM of the hand as Rose does) - this action also amplifies their sincerity.
One reason why Donald Trump is a more convincing liar than many politicians is that he touches his face (or anywhere on his head or neck) with much less frequency than do most people. It's important to stress that facial touching does NOT equate to lying. Taken in isolation, facial touching is a general indicator of anxiety. Yet when certain parts of the face are touched (do you know which?) - AND when these actions are clustered with particular paralanguage behavior, statement analysis patterns and other nonverbal signals - this can be an excellent indicator of deception. All human beings lie - and it's crucial to note that those who DON'T touch their face often - will still deceive - but they've learned to suppress this set of significant body language tells. But there is another explanation ...
A lesser known but profoundly important nonverbal phenomenon is that those who touch the face less during other times - particularly while watching, listening or reading stories of another person's emotional or physical suffering - even if it's fiction - have significantly lower empathy. Those with less empathy will, of course, not feel nearly the anxiety when they lie - and less anxiety equates to less facial touching.
This website serves as an objective reference source for the science and art of Body Language/Nonverbal Communication. In an effort to be both practical and academic, many examples from/of varied cultures, politicians, professional athletes, legal cases, public figures, etc., are cited in order to teach and illustrate both the interpretation of others’ body language as well as the projection of one’s own nonverbal skills in many different contexts – not to advance any political, religious or other agenda.
Austin and Aaron Rhodes have become YouTube personalities in the last six months and now have a considerable following. Yesterday the Rhodes Bros uploaded a particularly important video. The twins are gay and they had already come out to everyone in their family - except for their Dad who lives in another state. While they didn't want their father to find out via the Internet - this was the way they chose to tell the rest of the World. So they recorded the call to their dad along with their reactions to telling him.
There is a myriad of nonverbals tells during this 8:36 video. Many of these body language signals fit into a class of behaviors known as MAPs (an acronym for Manipulator, Adaptor, Pacifier) - which were mostly facial touching and hand/arm touching. In the context of this video & emotional conversation, most of these MAPs are general anxiety indicators (although very often and certainly several MAPs contained here can be more correlated with more specific emotions).
What is extremely interesting in this video interaction, is that as the emotional tension crescendos, not only do the MAPs of course increase in frequency (as expected), but the frequency and exactitude of their mirroring increases dramatically.
Mirroring is seen when people like each other and are of similar emotional mindsets - so it's not surprising at all that family members and especially twins mirror each other. The Rhodes Bros however mirror each other much more often than is typically seen. The closer they get to the point of telling their father pulls their entire mind-brain-bodies into increasing degrees of synchronicity - so that some moments almost seem choreographed (although they're not).
1:04
Near-mirroring
1:49
Near-mirroring
2:09
Near-mirroring
Note Aaron's (our right) central forehead contraction
2:09.5
Same side near-mirroring
Aaron touches/rubs tip of his nose
2:10
Austin almost touches his nose - thus mirroring Aaron from 1/2 second earlier (partial mirroring and slightly delayed)
2:20
Strong Mirroring
Both brothers turning away and down
2:25.5
Austin's Central Forehead Contraction
(CFC) - and (together with his mouth configuration) is highly consistent with high sincerity, high empathy and emotional pain
2:28
Mirroring head/neck configurations
Each turning away and down
2:41
Mirroring very closely with both their head/necks and hands/arms
2:51
Same side Mirroring
3:08
Near-Mirroring
3:45
Just after Aaron (our right) told their Dad that he and Austin are gay
Strong Mirroring
3:50
Near perfect mirroring
3:51
A second later they simultaneously each reached to rub the opposite eye vs. what they each were touching one second earlier (see above 3:50)
As many may expect, as soon as they told their father they were gay, the frequency and degree of MAPs decreased dramatically (not quite as much with Austin).
The most common reason people touch their face is not because of a rash, an allergy or a common cold. The most common cause of Facial Touching (Facial MAP aka Manipulator, Adaptor, Pacifier) is anxiety. Certainly there are many reasons for anxiety - but when touching the face, particularly at times of specific point-in-fact statements or when answering factual questions - the probability that deception is being attempted is very significantly elevated. This is even true when everyone knows you're lying - such as a during a joke or obvious hyperbole. The "itching" we feel on portions of our face when a lie is told is very real - it is brought about because of micro neuro-chemical and vascular changes - which in turn occur as a result of the anxiety which arises when a lie is told.
At the Al SmithMemorial Foundation Dinner in New York last night, both Mitt Romney and PresidentObama spoke and joked. A good bit of their humor was self-deprecating - but some was at the expense of others. Everyone who follows politics and the events & people being referenced knows the context of these deliberate and comedic lies. Yet sometimes we still glean useful information.
During the 0:13 - 0:15 mark, just after the President Jokes says, " ... Everyone please take your seats otherwise Clint Eastwoodwill yell at them ...." Obama scratches his nose with his right index finger. Of course Barack knows that Clint won't be hollering - so the source of his anxiety may very well have to do with his poor comedic delivery, what he feels is a poor joke selection by his writing staff or perhaps due to a less than eloquent and impromptu self-editing of the joke (note the President mispronounces Eastwood's last name).
At the 1:23 mark, the President displays a quick nose touch/scratch with the index finger of his left hand just after he says (paraphrased) that he's hoping Andrew Cuomo will someday be President. Barack is in no way hoping this - and the fact that he uses his left, dominant hand in this MAPdisplay is a nonverbal indicator that he feels this is a "bigger lie".
At the 4:54 mark, Obama touches his nose - in a manner nearly identical to the above Cuomo reference - with his left and dominant index finger after he references the Republican Party's Vice Presidential Candidate, " .... but Paul Ryan assured me that we've only been running for two hours and fifty-something minutes ...." - referencing Ryan's earlier fib (and not so small a deception particularly if you're a runner) and lying (by more than an hour) about his (Ryan's) marathon time. Again, by the President using his left and dominant hand in the display of this body language shows us that he believes this to be a "Pants On Fire" lie.
The democratic presidential candidate then touches his right ear with his right index finger at the 5:27 mark when referencing Honey Boo Boo. Similar to the first example regarding Mr. Eastwood, any anxiety he feels here probably is related to joke selection or something similar - and thus a lesser lie-joke from his point-of-view.
The next time you tell a lie, even a small one - most likely your face will itch. Try not to laugh ... but you probably will scratch.
Even Mitt Romney believes President Obama is a great speaker. Why didn't this translate into success in the first debate two weeks ago? The answer is multifaceted - but a good bit of it comes down to bad body language. In tonight's debate - in a town-hall format - Mr. Obama's and Mr. Romney's nonverbals will be even more important.
What many don't realize, is that not only does your body language indicate your emotional mindset, but adopting, maintaining, and/or changing your own nonverbal displays in many and nuanced contexts - will also changes your emotions, the fluidity by which you speak and will even affect your word choice.
Here are dozen body language debate pointers for both Presidential Candidates:
1. Stand with your feet slightly less than a shoulder's width apart. There's not a photo in existence of John Wayne standing with his feet together. This stance projects, builds and maintains confidence.
2. Stand with your feet flat on the floor. Barack Obama was standing on one foot (with opposite leg crossed in back of the other) during part of the last debate. This is Bad Body Language in this context. It sends messages of non-engagement and aloofness.
3. When an audience member or Candy Crowley (tonight's debate moderator) addresses you, turn and point your whole body towards them. Your feet, navel, torso, face and eyes - all should be pointing directly at them. This shows to everyone that you respect them and believe that whatever they are saying is worth listening to - and everyone watching will for a moment "inject" themselves into the shoes of the audience member who is asking the question. This is an absolute must for developing rapport, building bridges - and getting votes. This whole-body pointing should be down-regulated significantly when answering their questions because of course then you're speaking to the entire country.
Note: In everyday conversations, you should turn your feet and body about 20 to 30 degrees after 5 to 10 seconds once you've greeted them. Maintaining the "whole-body pointing posture" during one-on-one conversations is too confrontational. In the setting of a debate, primarily because of the audience-speaker context and greater distances between the audience and the candidates, pointing your whole body toward the audience member while they are asking the question is an absolute must. Failure to do this will cost you votes.
4. President Obama in particular - don't look down when the Mitt Romney is speaking. This gives the feel to the audience that you are being lectured to - or being reprimanded. Perhaps for a second or to if a lectern/podium is being used to write some notes, but look at the audience (primarily) or the other candidate (shorter glances and do not turn your whole body toward your opponent).
5. Hand and arm gestures (illustrators) should be used congruently with speech. President Obama - during the last debate your elbows were much too close to the sides of your torso during your illustrators. Such a configuration is low-energy, demure and beta. Of course you don't want to be overly dramatic with arm gestures either - proportion and context are paramount.
Mitt Romney - whoever is coaching you must have been reading my blog - for I'm the only expert who's been critiquing you heavily in this issue. You did much better with you hand/arm gestures during the first debate than you ever have before. Big improvement.
6. DO NOT, UNDER ANY CONDITION, PUT YOUR HANDS IN YOU POCKETS. This is a tremendous signal of non-engagement and emotional dissonance. Don't be aloof - be engaged in the moment. Depending on the other nonverbal signals present, hands in pockets may even signal that you are being deceptive, intimidated by your opponents or fearful.
7. NEVER TOUCH YOUR HEAD - PARTICULARLY YOUR FACE - OR NECK. These facial MAPs (Manipulators, Adaptors or Pacifiers) are (subconsciously) interpreted by nearly all who watch (even those 99.99% who have no formal body language training) as an ANXIETY SIGNAL. People don't necessary take note of every time another person touches their face - but they are left with a general feeling of unease. When you get a feeling that you can't trust someone (even though they may have said all the right things) - very often they just displayed this type of MAP/Body Language.
8. Avoid Contempt and disgust displays. You may solidify some of your base - but you'll lose many more of the undecided votes. If you need a primer here - watch either of your counterparts during the Vice Presidential debate. They both displayed contempt in spades. Contempt and disgust will alienate. They are rapport destroyers.
9. Smile with your eyes. Even children can detect a false smile. Smiling with your eyes first will bring your mouth along for the ride. Most otherwise accomplished and socially skilled people (including both presidential candidates) can't differentiate a sincere smile vs. a good social smile. Nor can you produce either type on demand when you really need to do so.
10. Don't over-use your forehead expressions. Over-use of the forehead muscles (particularly the central forehead contraction - aka CFC) is a primary indicator of insincerity. All but your hard-core base voters will read this as feigned sincerity. Few things are more repelling than smug insincerity. This is particularly true when a CFC is seen together with even a slight mouth smile.
11. Avoid using the conventional steeple. Most politicians over-use the conventional steeple - thus sending signals of arrogance and condescension. It's a primary example of using excessive alpha signals. If someone uses too much conventional steeple (which is, in an absolute sense, not very much) - run, don't walk away from them. Despite what they may say, you are a pawn in their game.
12. Hopefully you've slept for at least the past two or three nights. Barack Obama's primary problem in the last debate may very well have stemmed from lack of sleep. He repeatedly displayed several signals consistent with being tired. Many a skilled speaker, or surgeon, or attorney, or sales person have suffered from this fundamental.
