Body Language Analysis No. 4046: Melania Trump, Hurricane Harvey, and "Destroying Empathy 101" - Nonverbal and Emotional Intelligence (VIDEO, PHOTOS)

Earlier today, President Trump and The First Lady visited Austin and Corpus Christi to meet with Governor Abbott, other local leaders, first responders, etc. - and to offer their support for the those suffering in the wake of Hurricane Harvey.

Melania Trump took a lot of internet heat for departing the White House in  six-inch heels - although, perhaps getting wind of this popular opinion, she changed into sneakers on Air Force One.

We can make the argument that the primary reason the President and the FLOTUS (a title which does not require the wearing of a written label), visited Texas was to be the national face of empathy.

There are are a myriad of ways to express and engender empathy. Yet, when in the context of nonverbal communication, the behavior which is the most crucial for displaying empathy is eye contact - a subject which itself has many branches of nuance. And yet there can be no true eye contact if sunglasses are worn. Aside from the very practical aspect of south Texas having 100% overcast skies of late - wearing sunglasses is deliberately distancing.

When on camera, being interviewed, or even if simply in view - wearing sunglasses, particularly when in such a highly visible leadership position - is a nonverbal double standard. It screams, "I get to look into your eyes (and your soul), but I'll keep mine under wraps - thank you very much." Using this deliberate barrier is a nonverbal manifestation of contempt. It elevates the wearer and lowers everyone else.

With the exception of a funeral or similar ceremonies, in the context of others' suffering, wearing sunglasses is emotionally cold. It's snooty. It's aloof. It's rapport destroying. A leader should be open, inviting, sincere - and yes, projecting empathy. Transmitting empathy without the use of one's eyes is profoundly difficult and always incomplete. This is not about style. This is not about fashion. This is about people. And if you want to tell a person (or a nation), "I care about you and your suffering" - do NOT wear sunglasses (even if it's sunny).

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See also:

Body Language Analysis No. 4045: Rex Tillerson Regarding Donald Trump, "The President Speaks for Himself"

Body Language Analysis No. 4043: Donald Trump Pardons Joe Arpaio - Contempt of Court and Red Flags

Body Language Analysis No. 4041: Former Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak regarding Secrets from Donald Trump

Body Language Analysis No. 4039: Blue Angels, Surprise, Emotional Processing, and Empathy

Body Language Analysis No. 4026: Aubrey Plaza, Ingrid Goes West, and Emotional Intelligence

Body Language Analysis No. 4015: Reince Priebus' First Post-Resignation Interview

Body Language Analysis No. 3974: Elle Fanning, Robert De Niro, and Easter

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3924: French Presidential Front-Runner Emmanuel Macron

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3857: Taunting a Snowplow Driver - Belleville, Ontario - Body Language and Emotional Intelligence


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Nonverbal Communication Analysis #1516: Ozzie Guillen Apology, his "Sincerity Quotient" & Fidel Castro

Ozzie Guillen, the outspoken manager of the Miami Marlins, and the first Latino manager to win a World Series (with the Chicago White Sox in 2005), has landed himself in hot water recently for positive comments he's made regarding the Cuban dictator, Fidel Castro. He has since been issued a five game suspension.

In the two videos included in this post, Guillen has a very high "Sincerity Quotient". He's certainly an alpha male who's very good at what he does. In strong alpha individuals, it's extremely rare that a genuine apology or an honest and open discussion takes place when such an incident arises. You may like Guillen or "hate" him, but you've to respect this quality. "I'm sorry", "It's my fault", "forgive me" are three of the rarest statements, made in any language - particularly made so authentically.

When I began watching the second video, I was thinking - he should really take off his sunglasses - people will perceive him disingenuously if he leaves them on, etc. Then Ozzie himself spoke about the importance of "looking people in the eye". Later he repeated this as well as the significance being "face to face" when trying to patch things up. Guillen then took off his sunglasses. It was important for him - that other people to look him in the eye and see the sincerity and honesty in his eyes and on his face. He recognized the value of the human-to-human connection made during an apology and the increased ability to transmit such a very heart-felt emotion beyond that of just the words. Words are the symbols for the feelings which are the real movers in the hearts and minds of all those involved. I doubt Ozzie Guillen ever had a body language coach or read a book on nonverbal communication (indeed too few people have experienced either) but he certainly has and listens to his instinct.

Note that Ozzie did not stare at people when apologizing or discussing, if a person's eye contact increases over what it had been (generally speaking over 70% of the time when speaking in good, rapport generating conversation) - particularly when the STARE at someone's eye/eyes - there is an increased chance of deception taking place. Ozzie was not staring. His eyes naturally moved around to different people. If the amount of eye contact drops from baseline (or if a person keeps/puts their sunglasses on) - this also increases the likelihood that a lie is being told.

See also: Secret # 335: What does "Eye Contact" really mean?

Ozzie is sincere. If I were an attorney conducting voir dire (jury selection), I'd pick him any day.

What Guillen may lack in verbal discretion, he certainly makes up for in nonverbal intuition. Go Marlins!